The Readers

It's strange how one thing that we all humans have in common i.e Time, decides to change one fine day.

Forget women it's the 'Time’ that has a major share of mood swings, up and down, good and bad, chaos and peace.

As for me, it's just been still lately. Though the clock is ticking but I am not moving along with it.

I never realised I would reach this far with this blog.

Writing has always been a hobby since I was a child but until 2years back it was never public. All the firing motivation & courtesy to my sister in law that these words found life.

Initial phase was an insecure one, difficult to understand what is good or bad, what is safe to write, what will attract the masses, what will not make the people judge thinking it's my story. All these insecurities yet no readers.😀

I started reading more, observing everything around me better and slowly outgrew all those apprehensions.

Fiction or reality, love or hate, humour or sarcasm, poetry or stories etc I decided to give it all to the outside world and leave upto them to decide the background.

The readers are free to search for the source or feel the pain or find the truth behind every piece I write.

I will continue the way I want.

It doesn't matter as long as I stay immortal in these verses.

The readers still exist.

Somewhere away in the desert, dusted in the weather, reading everything I write.

Some overseas for whom I don't know if they know that I know about them.😋

One placidly reading & searching for solace.

One far away in a shady place waiting for some light from here.

And don't even get me started about the one who is advising me to write our story!😱

I secretly hope there are more. The anonymous followers add the spices for changing the flavours time to time.

Happy to celebrate the 💯 with you all.

Cheers!

You will always find me here…

Auldrin

The friend who abandoned me!

‘You need a haircut, it's like horse's tail in the end’- she said.

'I don't have both time and money to spend right now’- I replied.

'Come here’- she said approaching with a giant pair of scissors in her hand, probably which tailors use to cut clothes with.

I didn't run. There was no point of doing that as she would outrun me. Though lean and thin but she was much stronger.

I woke up to the reality. No one was around me. No hostel room. The walls looked different too. It was a dream again of my friend and I was home.

Almost over 8 months now, since she left the hostel without saying a word to me and never contacted again.

My college time best friend with whom I shared my darkest secrets, one fine day disappeared into the thin air. No other friend knowing about her whereabouts. No response from any of the contacts she had given me. None of her own working as well. No response from anyone in the family. No one answered at the home address I'd found in the directory. No idea whether or not she's alive. Nothing!

Frustrating isn't it?

Filled with rage?

Feeling dejected?

You won't know how I feel.

We had been together for years, in all our ups and downs, in sickness and in health, with love and laughter growing the unconditional bond of trust.

Yet she's gone with no clue behind.

No hint of trouble and no tinge of despair.

No trail behind for me to follow.

I am living with it everyday now, some days awake and some nights in dreams.

I always loved her eyes until now for I feel betrayed by them. Life has been a constant turmoil since then.

During the initial weeks I used to dream of a dark lonely passage with her being at the other end. I would try to walk towards her but the passage ended into a bright light burning my eyes. I used to wake up scared.

The next following weeks were spent dreaming of atrocities of our country. Tears rolling out of my eyes in sleep.

My thoughts crowded with fears regarding her well being.

But I didn't want to give up.

So I have decided to stay here at the other end of the tunnel hoping for her return.

Along the support of her dreams again, this time all the happy and fun-filled ones.

Also, with my fingers crossed!

QOTD- Has anyone of you ever been in my shoes?

Auldrin

HibernationLetters 17

Sona!

My ears are echoing with this name and eyes filled with flashes of the first time you said it.

I can vividly remember every second of that day and night.

Every smile, every laugh, every touch, every memory pellucid infront of my eyes.

“There was a time when we both shared rains from the same cloud.

Now even the the clouds above us come at different times.” (-saved into drafts)

“There was a time when our fights were dissolved by snuggling.

Now such closeness has become one of the reasons for the fights.” (-saved into drafts)

“There was a time when my tears were caressed by your lips.

Now those lips speak hurtful words to cause more tears.” (-saved into drafts)

“There was a time when you would never let me go.

Now you finally decided not to stay anymore.”(-saved into drafts)

You continued with those harsh words uninterruptedly and here all my replies were converting one by one into drafts.

It’s been days, I haven't heard you calling me 'Sona’ or any other of those names you gave to the ultimate silence now at both ends.

Auldrin

HibernationLetters 16

You come and go like seasons now, but my weather has remained constant since the first time you left.

Last night I chose to be there again, next to you on the lake side. The water extending beyond our sight stirring us everytime the balmy breeze came our way. Somehow surrounded by tranquility the love shared seemed more profound. Sitting there till sunset staring into your eyes was worth every second. How much the water scared you and I kept assuring about my swimming skills that I would save the both of us incase the pier we sat on cracks.

Remembering all this I fell asleep. For the first time in the past 3 weeks I could finally sleep at night, like a baby. My thoughts were converted into dreams and there I was again with you cycling in circles around that lake. Sharing our joyful childhood memories where cycles used to be one of the prized possessions of a kid.

Amidst these incessant memories I found peace, this time without your physical presence but equally fulfilling. The chaos in my head eventually settled.

You seem to do fine as well.

Reminiscing all this almost made me miss my station.

I have to leave now. See you soon in the dream palace tonight!

Auldrin

Father's day chronicles (TheTelegraphicTales)

Today being Father's day, me and the officer geared up for our own personal way of celebration.

Walk and talk followed by a day filled with conversations pouring out gems.

That's our idea of making the day special, being in each other's company.

Here are a few glimpses.

Have you read today's TOI newspaper?

Do visit the LG vs AAP column on page 4.

Delhi's CM is successfully entertaining us with his hysterical behaviour for a couple of years now. Though now his cough & scarf are in a dormant state, his dialogue delivery shall leave you appalled.

Just like the headline of this column-

“PM Modi neither talks to me nor looks at me nor allows me to talk”.

If you've been hearing the recent events, Mr. Kejriwal is on a so called ‘dharna’ in an AC hall just outside the LGs office. By the images on the television he and his associates were comfortably lying there while his city was eating fried eggs straight from the pans kept outside in open. In this scorching heat and water shortage aren't the ministers supposed to be in their offices working for their people.

Why do we need strikes to meet the demands in our own country? Also, Can't we be the ones to take a step further for its betterment.

Anyways, I am sure that a man solely dedicated to his work, not even daring to stay with a wife will hardly pay attention to a raving person on his path.

Somewhere I still feel that nobody tops the list of maintaining a caricature like our one and only “Pappu”.

On the day our ex-PM, Mr. A B Vajpayee was admitted to the hospital, his first visitor was the famous leading member of the Gandhi clan! I wonder Mr. Rahul Gandhi had forgotten about the latter being a BJP member and not Congress but it was too late to turn around then.

Aahh...we had our share of laughter now you can too.

Amidst these discussions, Baba Ramdev ji appeared on the TV screen doing his extraordinary yoga stunts ('nauli kriya’ being one of them).

The bodyguard asked my lady to make mango shake and taking advantage of the perfect timing, she whimsically replied -

”Beta, why don't you have a glass of milk along with a mango and perform 'nauli kriya’!”

Hahahaha..the cheers of laughter filled the room.

Hoping for the day to continue in the same way

See you later.

QOTD- If Pappu and Kejru are the only people left with you on this planet, what would you prefer to do?

Have a happy Sunday.

Auldrin

Special

“You have so much potential.

What are you doing with a man like me?”

-he said

And all I could think of was, “I'm feeling special.”

“Yes! You make me feel special. From the 10 minutes of tea time to those 10 hours of inconsistent talks, I feel special for the time you spend with me. From arguing with me to kissing my angry face, I feel loved for you staying during those nonsensical times. From the first time I showed you my tears to the moment you hid yours infront of me, I feel courageous than before. I can go on and on innumerably….”

He brought me back to the conversation we were having, well not the above part for that was only running inside my head.

“He wants me to just write

night and day

for he'll read them all

when his hair turn gray.”

Losing my focus again when words started making poems in my head but I realised what I wanted. It's difficult, it's a long journey and rather than thinking about my futile attempts in future, now is the time I have to act upon my choices. I have nothing to worry about, I can't be bothered by what others might think because I'll have you right by my side, forever.

QOTD - Are you still waiting to act on your wishes?

Well hurry this sensible awakening offer lasts only till your heart believes in you and your mind follows the path.

Good night fellas!

Auldrin

Book Review-The Colours of Passion

The Colours of Passion

Author- Sourabh Mukherjee

Publisher- Readomania

Format- Paperback

M.R.P- 250

No. of pages- 237

This is my first book reading of the author Sourabh Mukherjee. Well it's a common act by any reader to check out stuff of the writers belonging to their same region, but staying in Kolkata this book will make you imagine the streets as the story goes along. Thanks to Amazon and WritersMelon for this review copy.

It's a murder mystery filled love story which caught me by surprise for the way the author designed its plot. Intriguing with so many characters there was a movie running in my eyes with every single word I read. It includes some bitter truths about our film industry, the rumours we hear from media about spat between actors, love affairs, flings, personally I feel there is a certain amount of truth hidden in them. Yes, the media surely exaggerates any incident but that is what attracts us to read the article or interview etc in the first place. There is depiction of the social behaviour of a lover facing social stigma in the societies of our incredible country.

The story starts with the headlines of murder mystery of an actress after being brutally raped leading into an police investigation with a leading detective into such diversity of suspects all being equally important. It amazes me how the author could think of such variety of plots, then interlinking them well enough to give goosebumps to his curious readers. After that it moves on to another actor's suicide cum homicide, such murders one after another will indeed give you an adrenaline rush while you read it towards the end. No matter how much I guessed the outcome yet the author took me by surprise with such an unexpected finish. The beginning hitted off great, the in-between storyline got pretty much mundane but it had a fantastic end and I would suggest you to surely check it out, especially those looking for crime mystery/thriller with Indian touch.

A wonderful thriller piece by Sourabh Mukherjee making me greedy to read more of his suspense detective novel.

From the book-

“Sometimes the deepest of the wounds need the simplest of words to heal.”

“In a split second, I pushed him. Off the edge of that balcony. And I watched him fall to sleep, to eternal peace that his tormented soul demanded.”

Rating- 4/5

Happy reading fellas!

©Auldrin❤

Green Revolution (TheTelegraphicTales)

Today I went for plant shopping, early Sunday morning. For past few months I have been living alone in my allotted room in the hostel. Though I have two more roommates, both of them being senior to me but they just come once a week and rest of the time is just me. I have lived alone before too, it's a different feeling. A mixture of ‘independence’, ‘freedom’ for it gives you space to do anything you want and ‘hardships’ for you have to do everything by yourself like cleaning, washing etc.

For past few days there developed an intense desire of having someone, not a human for it will continuously blabber, not a pet too because there might be moments I feel it's noisy. How about a plant, I thought. Unlike my mother I was never into gardening and I know they need as much care & love like humans or animals still I decided to go for the green revolution in my life. A white hibiscus it is, placed on my room's windowpane in such a position that every morning when I'll open my eyes, my eyes will be blessed with a beautiful view.

As soon as I placed it there, my heart suddenly filled with immense happiness and positive energy. It was such a great feeling that I couldn't help but show it too my parents over phone and my neighbouring friends a live view. My mother gave the name 'green revolution’ hence the title! Someone told me that “taking care of life in a plant, animal, human is really intimate & rewarding”, while there was another who told me how it won't survive for long. My glad face immediately converted into a tensed one but soon I decided to neglect the negative comment & focus on the positive ones, “I'll take care of you”, I promised the plant and sat looking at it in a blissful state of mind.

Strange it is, how a small plant could suddenly give such immense joy and optimism. It made me realise I won't be living alone now, I have a company of my beautiful white hibiscus.
~©Auldrin❤

First times (TheTelegraphicTales)

Today is just one day break I've got after an year long of Internship. Ahh...it amazes me to recall how far I've come, what all I went through, from seeing deaths and pretending emotionless to seeking love for self in between. I have grown, I have matured for I have learnt the professional aspect of life. Though many more years are to come, yet more than theoretical knowledge it's practicality of life that I've learnt. They will all stay in my memory forever, all the “first-times”!

The first time when I walked through the corridors of the medicine ward as a doctor. First day of work when I saw a soul leaving an old fragile body, I still remember the ashen face, it was the first time I learned to declare death. The day I did a first pleural tap in a patient with severe respiratory distress and how immediately I saw her breathing getting relieved from under such pressure. The first time when I made the biggest blunder of my life. The first time I realised that not everyone has a family and started taking care of an unknown patient. I remember his face, his lean and thin body with a huge abdomen filled with water, just like that of a pregnant woman. How daily we poked him with needles to take out 1-2 litres of water from inside his abdomen. Till the day he died, but he died relieved. The first time when a patient blessed me with happiness and good luck, the first time a patient brought for a small statue of a bird which she made herself and the first time I did lumbar puncture on the same patient to confirm the diagnosis of meningitis.

There was a first time I did a suture, in the CBOT, where life taught me another strange lesson that death is the best when it's sudden for the slow ones are too painful. I have had mornings that began with gruesome RTA’s, blood everywhere, surrounded with casualties and me standing in between, working.

I treasure the memory when I solely assisted a mother into delivering a healthy baby girl. The first time when I had to repair the episiotomy wound of a mother who had delivered a big baby. Although I always had a liking towards the subject of Paediatrics but my first day began with fear for the sensitivity of the treatment required for tiny little babies. Where the counseling of a mother comes first, even before you touch her child for anything. But ironically the day ended with beautiful smiles on the small kids. I reminisce about the day when I held a newborn in my arms for the first time. The days and nights that I spent sleepless looking after the babies in the NICU gave me a satisfaction rather than fatigue.

Then came the day when I finally learned how to put a cast on a fractured joint or limb. I recalled the statement everyone used to say, just clear your entrance then life would be fun in a medical college, just clear your MBBS & internship would be fun, but it was in my rural posting when I finally mastered how to survive.

And then sequentially after few minor postings I finally faced the dreadful “general ER”. It was a menace. Hundreds of patients in just a 12-hour shift, never thought of even counting for a day. Standing on toes during the whole shift, treating and advising people to go home, I myself used to return to my room, dead with fatigue. Yet the intriguing thing was the peaceful sleep I used to get once I came back.

To be honest I have always avoided to be in situations where there were cut injuries requiring skills of suturing, this much I was sure of that I disliked them from the core of my heart. I still laugh at myself recalling the day I had my last on-call. My night shift was to end at 8am in the morning and just at 7:30am arrived a little boy with his father. No Matter how much you try to run away from your fears you end up facing them one day. I was in no position to call anyone, neither my seniors nor my juniors, it had to be done by me, solely. So finally I did it. It was my last on-call of a year long Internship and the boy was my first patient on whom I did a suture all alone. (Sssshhhh..he didn't know that, but that little boy taught me patience by expressing it himself, at the age of 8yrs he was bolder than me for he didn't even move an inch while I did it all.)

All's well that ends well! Today is just one day I've got to spend without any calls to attend. From tomorrow I will face a new beginning, a new challenge & a new me!

Signing off.

~©Auldrin❤

Clear

Graphic novels (TheTelegraphicTales)

You see and feel,
All stories don't need words!

I picked up a graphic fiction from the store today, the 'Legends of Halahala' by Appupen. It's a silent classic tales of love and adventure from a mythical world through different periods​ of history. When I decided to start with it my initial reaction was, What is this? What is wrong with me? What did I just buy? but after an hour I made my favourite tea and thought about patiently taking a look at each and every page. Maybe that's what the artists want people to do. Their distinctive art is beyond our imagination yet the more it reaches to different regions the more it would be understood. Finally that is what I did, sat down with my cup of tea and looked at each and every picture, turning every single page carefully so as to not miss anything, until the very end where to my surprise I understood my version of the stories. Captivated in an era where my time seized. The artist is surely fascinating and was successful in making my first attempt at graphic novel awesome, leaving me hungry for more.
Signing out for now.

©Auldrin❤

New series~TheTelegraphicTales

Naked

Garnering pieces

For long now

I have endured,

like a wanderer

on this path.

One by one

being acquainted,

day by day

getting befriended.

A part of me

they know,

a piece of me

I share.

Eventually,

forging ahead

yet leaving

a trail behind.

With only

a little hope

that one day

someone

would go on a quest,

to garner

all those stories

& know me

once and for all.

Drabble~100 words!

Hope (TheTelegraphicTales)

Mother always had everything we would ask for, from clothes to food & games to play. What else did we need back then?

Unlike home, here we had to go down the hill to buy things. Basic necessities like food, drinking water, soaps, etc were all available but only in the town.

We, me and my brother, were living in a small area in the outskirts of a village, where he used to teach and I was supposed to do the household chores because mother was no more. Daily during the trips to the town I would see an old smoky grey haired woman living on the footpath. Her eyes full of fatigue, weary face and wilting walk just compelled me to stare her everyday.

Her worn out appearance were due to the mishappening elements all through her life. Due to short on resources myself I could never act upon, but always thought about rectifying her condition when I have funds.

After months, one day I finally had money and rushed to find her but she was gone. Where, when, why, nobody knew. Infact some people thought of me as a lunatic, asking whether she even existed or am I cooking up a story to seek attention.

Finally there came the time, I could help her but she was gone. All I was left with was a heavy heart and many ‘ifs’. If I could have come earlier, if I could have asked her to wait for me, what if something happened to her, all this was happening inside my mind.

I didn't even know if ever she too noticed me all this while, or she did wait for me but was left with no time. I told my brother about her. He hugged me like I was still his tiny little sister and whispered in my ear, “She's safe dear sister, I arranged for a shelter for her at an ashram she wished to be and she has given this for you”.

He gave me a note. With tear filled anxious eyes I read, 'All this while your kind, concerning eyes helped me to not lose hope and survive’.

The end.

-Auldrin

Coffee O Kobita

This is where

I wanted to express

My feelings for him

Not by mere words

But just bringing him here

This is where

After searching places

To surprise him

I finally saw his glittering eyes

Me being gifted

At the same time

This is where

The clock would stop

So that there's no pause

In our conversations

With love he simply watched

& I would continuously talk

This is where

In a tiny shell

People come and go,

But our memories

Will live forever...

Khamoshiyaan

'Khota Sikka'

Silence